I am determined to spend my future Christmas holidays in Tokyo with my family and friends from next year onwards. I have been feeling really sad staying alone here and being apart from them.
The only reason I came back to England in early December was that I had a few meetings: one with my supervisor, and the others with the office about my teaching contract and an interview for another teaching position.
The office asked me whether I was interested in an academic position for undergraduate modules and to come to the interview if I was. I seriously considered it and asked some people for some advice. Engaging in a teaching job is the goal for my career, but my PhD research should be prioritised and is more important. Having an excessive amount of work in the daytime and evening would be too much for me, some people said. My family pushed me to go for the interview, whatever the result.
As it turned out, I wasn’t appointed the position, but it did make me stop and think about my past experiences and knowledge of just a tiny part of the academic field where I am. By knowing the result of the interview, I have been carefully able to focus on the work I already have and on what I should do in order not to fail.
It sounds really ridiculous that I am writing this, because I was an accountant working for a software company until two years ago. There was no teaching experience at all in my life except for some workshop experience that I did this year. If I had a family and a child, my dream job would definitely be an etiquette teacher just for my child! Sometimes jobs can be everything and the whole life. Whenever I started those previous jobs, I loved them with all my heart and soul. So, it might be shame that my feelings changed and that I am now obsessed with a different, brand-new career.
Anyway, one of my New Year’s resolutions is to keep excellent records of my reading, writing, teaching and thoughts, which is the most commonly mentioned advice for first year PhD students.
I’m missing Japan so much!